This weekend, Joni, Liz, Kris and I attended Grace and Paul's wedding. At 12:30, Liz and Kris and I went to Joni's house to eat lunch, make the bouquets for the bride and bridesmaids, make the boutineers (that cannot be spelled correctly), frost the groom's cake, make a pillow for the ring bearer, and gather up music and candle holders.
Once we got to the church a little before 3, the choir was practicing. The wedding was at 3:30. 3:15...still practicing. 3:28...still practicing. The choir finally left, and then we sat there and waited for everyone to get there. 3:55...the bride is still not at the church. 4:00...the Chinese minister performing part of the wedding tells us to start the wedding march (yeah, put the foreigners in charge of the music for the ceremony that is all in Chinese). The song kept going and nobody is coming, so she tells us to turn the music off. Everyone sits down. A few minutes later, she tells us to turn the music on again and this time the wedding actually began. People talked all the way through, Grace yelled at her dad to leave if he was going to talk on his cell phone, so he did leave, and they had to go find him before they could light the unity candle. All in all, it was a pretty entertaining wedding.
Then we went to the bride's dinner, which was at a new restaurant in town. We sat around for about an hour and a half before we ate (we were starving!) Once they started bringing food, almost everything had la jiao (peppers). Since there were only foreigners at our table besides Seb and David, we couldn't eat most of the food because our mouths just can't handle it. We just sat around, starving, looking at mounds of food that nobody could eat. Then we got something not-spicy: turtle soup. With a turtle floating in it. Let's just say that we went home pretty hungry. . .
I bought shoes. That's right, ladies and gentlemen, I, queen of the size 8 1/2, found shoes in China. They were in the bin marked "These are way too big for anyone else in this country, so we are putting them on sale!" So for 35 kuai (about $4.50), I have pink shoes. My sister also bought bright pink tennis shoes while she was living abroad. Apparently it's a Schleske girl tradition.
The reason that I came across these shoes is that I was shopping with Joni. Joni is performing the wedding of Paul and Grace on Saturday (they are Chinese), and she needed black shoes to go with the dress she just had tailored. This is a lot harder than it sounds, and we spent a good two hours looking at black shoes.
In some of the cheaper stores, they keep extra sizes in the ceiling, so there is a rope with a basket attached to it, and some poor guy has to sit in the ceiling all day raising and lowering shoes. I was crouched down looking at tennis shoes that were on sale when a red high heel mysteriously came plummeting down from the ceiling and landed on me. It was hysterical. Also, in many shoes stores, they don't realize that we can speak Chinese. Or, more accurately, that Joni can speak Chinese, so they spend five minutes trying to find someone who isn't afraid to talk to the foreigners, which is even funnier.
On a side note, for those of you who talk to Dad, I have my very own stalker who is in a cult. Isn't that fun? Also, there is a student at school whose parents sell things on the street, are very poor, and are in bad health. The student works a job and goes to school. He tried to gamble to get money for his parents to see a doctor, and now he is addicted to gambling. He tried to commit suicide the other day. Joni is paying for his parents to see a doctor in Guiyang, hopefully on Monday after the wedding. Also, I am going through a phase of culture shock where I have huge mood swings, and sometimes my heart just feels kind of dead.
On a lighter note, we are going to a wedding on Saturday! We are going to Joni's for lunch. I have to French braid her hair, and we are going to help carry the groom's cake and a bunch of other stuff to the wedding. I'll let you know how it goes!
See below for some of China's finest citizens. How many babies do you think I can fit in my suitcase? Two, maybe three if I fold them correctly?
I currently have a very short woman sleeping on my couch. Don't worry, she didn't sneak in. She's supposed to be there. I gave her a blanket and a pillow and everything. The team from Guiyang is here for the weekend. Susie is staying with me since she is allergic to cats. Sue and Kara are staying with Kris, and Matthew and April are staying with Liz. In ten minutes, we are all supposed to play ultimate frisbee. However, Liz and I don't do the sports thing all that well, so we are taking Kara into town :) Well, I must go to the bathroom (in order to avoid squatty potties later) and wake Sleeping Beauty...more on our expedition later!
This is the third stinkin cockroach I've found in my bathroom since Wednesday! Notice that he's dead. This is not a cockroach-friendly home, buddy. I know the floor is dirty. Between a drain that doesn't drain, a washing machine that drains onto the bathroom floor, a drippy pipe, and the maintenance people, it's impossible to keep it clean.
A few observations about China:
-Being a teacher means having chalk all over you and your stuff all the time
-It's not weird to see a man on the street playing a recorder...with his nose
-They think it's weird if you want to buy a chicken without the head or feet
-The sound of a (dead) chicken's head and feet being cut off is just as gross as seeing it
-Hearing water buffalo cry is really, really sad
-Chinese students are really stupid about cheating--I catch 'em every time
That said, I have posted more pictures in kodakgallery.com. Login is slushmuffin@hotmail.com and the password is sararenee in case you forgot! They're mostly right around the school or around Anshun.
Here's a little tidbit of information for you. I just registered with the US Embassy so that I can receive aid in the event of an illness, death (not necessarily my own), legal trouble, or other emergencies...like North Korea blowing us all up. So far, there is no evidence that the possible nuclear testing conducted by North Korea a few days ago is posing any health risks to Americans in any area of China, so please talk to Dad and ask him that it stays that way!
It is another Thursday evening here in China. Last night, the electrical outlet that my refrigerator was plugged into blew a circuit so it no longer works. Plus there are burn marks on the outlets from previous tenants. I called Charlie, and he told me to stay in my "flat" (apartment) all morning tomorrow. I was like umm...I teach from 8-12 tomorrow. He said oh, you teach? I said yes, I do. After much discussion, we finally agreed that the maintenance people will be here tomorrow afternoon, hopefully. They have to be getting sick of my apartment, as they were here yesterday twice. Once to fix the light in my study (accomplished) and once to fix my bathroom drain (still doesn't work).
The reason I know that the bathroom drain still doesn't drain (well, it drains, just at a painfully slow pace) is that I showered last night. Quite the accomplishment, I know. I will proceed to explain how this shower eventually leads to the fact that I am having a really difficult time moving today. And no, I didn't fall. It's much more complicated than that.
To begin, I entered my bathroom with every intention of taking a warm shower and sitting in front of the heater so that my hair would dry before bed. While I was hanging my clothes on the door, I noticed that I had a visitor--a cockroach. Apparently I'm getting better at this cockroach business, because instead of screaming and dancing around, I merely sighed and padded back to my room for the bug spray. I sprayed the cockroach and then the drains in the bathroom. Then I watched the little sucker die. I think China is making me sadistic.
Anyway, cockroaches actually take a long time to die--several hours, and sometimes up to a couple of days. I know this because of my now-vast experience with them. I hate trying to sweep up cockroaches that are still partly alive because they flip over and start crawling again, so I left the little guy there in the corner while I showered. He was fine until I began sweeping the water toward the drain, and then he began to float. That's when I shrieked and got the heck out of the bathroom.
This morning, I sleepily wandered toward the bathroom with every intention of sweeping up the cockroach which had had a decent amount of time to die and throw it out the window. What I was not expecting was a second dead cockroach just outside the bathroom door. Upon further prodding with the dustpan, I determined that it really was fully dead, so I swept it up first. The really disturbing thing is that I can't figure out where they come from. An occasional cockroach is to be expected, but two of them make me nervous. My house is not a good place for them to procreate.
Anyway, I digress. I swept up the cockroach outside the door and then proceeded into the bathroom, ready to do battle with roach #2. Apparently cockroaches that have been wet are more difficult to sweep, so as I bent over to get it into the dustpan without having to actually touch it, I pulled something in my lower back. I now hobble around like an old woman, and I've spent a lot of time laying on the couch today.
All of this, and it's not even a good story. I mean, I've had a lot of stupid injuries. Concussion sumo wrestling with Laura, broken toe from running into the couch, jammed fingers from hitting the rail at the zoo, scars from falling off the cart on an alpine slide, but really...a pulled muscle because I was sweeping up a cockroach? Honestly. That's just ridiculous. I'm 22, for pete's sake. I am supposed to be young and indestructible! ...Or something like that. Dr. Dan, I need you!
Anyway, that's all for now. And to a certain friend, Wilma says hi and she loves you.
I never, ever thought I'd say this, but...I wish I'd gain some weight! I need my pants to stay ON--they like us to be dressed when we teach. And it's chilly outside.
I made cucumber salad the other day. Nothing exciting, just cucumbers, salt, pepper, and a little vinegar. It's your basic cucumber salad. I eat it frequently. Frequently enough that I have a pretty good idea of what it should taste like. I'm a cucumber connoisseur, if you will. Last night, I was eating cucumber salad and there was something that didn't taste...cucumber-y. It wasn't too much vinegar, which sometimes happens, and it wasn't too much salt, which is another potential hazard of cucumber salad. As a girl who eats a lot (ask my mother), I have quite a refined palate. So I chewed and chewed and chewed, and finally I was able to identify the flavor: soap. Apparently my rinsing skills could use some work. Mmm...Palmolive cucumbers...
This will be a random collection of thoughts (aren't they all?)
To begin:
How cold is it in my house right now? It's cold enough that I'm sitting here in sweatpants, socks, slippers, the same hoodie I've been wearing since Thursday (yeah yeah it's gross) and the hat that Gina sent with pom poms on the top, wrapped in a blanket. Just for the record, I did not teach class in this outfit. I changed.
It's cold enough that in the mornings, I get up and get dressed as quickly as possible and then put on a coat and sit around wrapped in a blanket until I have to leave. Well, I've reached a new low. Since going to the mirror would require me to leave the comfort of my blankety cocoon, I've started using CD's as mirrors. They're not that flattering--kind of like fluorescent lighting--but it's good enough.
Before you start feeling terribly sorry for me, a good chunk of the problem is not that it's cold. It's that I'm a wimp. I have three times as much body fat as a Chinese person, so I don't know what my problem is. I come to class in two or three layers and a coat. My students come to class in track suits. Whatever. I have no problem being the ridiculous-looking foreigner.
I bought a crock pot and a heater today. I am moving up in the appliance world! My crock pot has a terra cotta...well...pot. It's absolutely fabulous, and I'm very sad that it doesn't fit in my suitcase. I tried. I'll enjoy it while I can and bid it farewell next summer.
I got boxes today from my mom and Gina. (THANK YOU GINA! I was soooo excited! And THANK YOU MOM! But you already know that.) I got a ton of socks, a hat, mittens, fruit snacks, a scarf, Chapstick, clothes, shoes, tuna, chocolate, beef jerky, slippers, letters, and a bunch of other stuff. I made it all the way to the real mayonnaise and dryer sheets at the bottom of my mom's box before I started crying.
A few boxes ago, I got Mark's hoodie by mistake. In the most recent box, I got one of Laura's shirts, probably by mistake :) Sorry Laura! I seem to be taking a collection of clothing from the family. If you are missing a clothing item, I probably have it. And I'm not sending it back, suckers! :) I love having things that belong to you guys close to me. It makes me think of you.
A note on Chinese bus drivers/taxis: Riding in Chinese buses and taxis is a little like what it would be like if you handed a 7-year-old the keys to a car and told them to have at it. But I don't see too many people walking around missing limbs, so I guess it works.
Remember how last time I told you I found Dove chocolate in the grocery store? Well, we also found Snickers. But when we went to the register, they wouldn't ring up and they wouldn't let us have them. They could've gone to look up the price, but I think they are imposing a diet on us. It was funny. I'm sure it was even funnier to see the looks of horror on our faces as they put our Snickers next to the register instead of in our bags. Next time, I'm fighting for it. I'll just keep saying, "Wo yao!" (I want!) until they give in and walk the thirty feet to do a price check :)
Well I am off to sign for my salary and beg Charlie to fix my light, drain, and electricity. I have no doubt that it'll be a conversation to remember. . .
I realize the last couple of posts have been rather anti-China. A good friend recently told me to stop hating China, and I'm trying...really. Here's a happier story for you. It involves food, so it's gotta be good.
On Tuesday night after we got back from the cloth market and a teaching methods class that Joni taught, I was too tired to cook dinner. Plus I hadn't been to the market for awhile, so I had a pound of frozen ground pork, some Saltines, and a little peanut butter. Liz could probably make a meal out of it, but I am not that talented, nor did I want to think that hard. So I decided to get dinner to go from our favorite restaurant on campus. How hard could it be?
I took my list of things I wanted. There were a few extra on there, because at any given time the restaurant may not have something, so I wanted to be like a Boy Scout--always prepared.
Unfortunately, as I discovered, the restaurant owner doesn't read pinyin (Chinese words written with the alphabet instead of characters). Not only does he not read pinyin, I don't write characters. There was a group of students in the restaurant, and I had a dictionary in my bag, so between all of us I finally placed my order. I wanted it in a box. I know the word for box (hezi), but I don't know if that's what you call to-go containers. Actually, now that I think about it, it's probably not the right word, because I said it and made a box with my hands and the restaurant guy (who is the nicest guy) pulled out half a cabbage. I was like uh, no. Bu yao! (Don't want!) I invited myself into the kitchen and started snooping around through the spices and plates and bowls until I found the styrofoam boxes that I was looking for. I held it up in triumph and everyone in the restaurant started cracking up. I can't blame them, I was laughing too.
In China, you always eat family style. Unless you are eating alone, and then you just eat...alone. But ordinarily, you order one or maybe two dishes for each person and they put all the plates in the middle of the table. You have a bowl of rice that is yours, but otherwise you take food out of the middle with your chopsticks, bite by bite. If there's something you don't like, you don't have to take some to be polite--nobody will ever notice. Eating out with sick people is a bad idea, though, because you are essentially all eating from the same plates with your dirty chopsticks. I really like the variety, though. I don't know how I'll go back to ordering one thing in restaurants. What if I don't like it? I'm also probably going to have a hard time not sticking my fork into the dishes in the middle of the table once I get back to the States.
Anyway, I had a point before I went off on this little tangent. My point was that I actually only really wanted two dishes from the little restaurant, but I ended up with four. It's easier to just go with the flow and eat leftovers for a few days. I got pork, green beans, potatoes, and some other vegetable that I'm pretty sure I've never eaten before.
That restaurant makes the best food out of any place in town. I got amazing food, and I gave another group of people a story to tell at parties for a long time to come. It was a good time for all parties involved!
The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain. The rain in China stays mainly...everywhere. It has been raining for three days straight. As a native of Denver, where it never really rains for more than half an hour at a time, I'm a little unsettled. I don't like the sogginess, mud, and puddles. I hate how the bottom of my pants get wet. I don't like being damp. Which is why, for the last two and a half days, I have been outside of my apartment for a grand total of 15 minutes. I went to get my caffeine fix and promptly returned. That's right, I've spent Thursday, yesterday, and this morning (it's only 9:00) bumming around, reading, watching movies, staring into space, playing around on the internet, and otherwise wasting time. I did manage to accomplish a load of laundry which is as wet today as it was yesterday when I hung it up.
There's a relatively good reason for my sloth-like behavior. Besides the fact that I just don't want to go outside because it's gross and cold, we went to Guiyang on Wednesday and the cloth market on Tuesday. I've been a busy girl! Joni took us to the cloth market Tuesday. It's a section of town where they sell...cloth. Chinese silk, polyester, cotton, denim, fleece, tweed, corduroy...you name it. If you want to have something made, you go find the cloth you want and buy some and then take it to a tailor. To have a fall/winter coat custom made is 120 yuan including the fabric, stuffing, and sewing costs. That's kind of expensive for us, but for you Americans it's about $15. The end of all the cloth streets opens up into a Sam's Club-sized warehouse that has more fabric, socks, underwear, shoes, insoles, zippers, screwdrivers, beads for your doorways, bedspreads, and all sorts of random stuff.
After exploring that to our heart's content, we went to lunch at a new stir fry restaurant. It was like American stir fry! The food was amazing. American Chinese food is nothing like Chinese Chinese food. No egg rolls or wontons here, and no sweet and sour in the southern part of the country. Also, hardly anything has broccoli or carrots in it. Almost everything has tomatoes and scallions and hot peppers (la jiao). I miss American Chinese food!
Our trip to Guiyang was a little chilly and wet, but we had a good time. Rickey was there visiting her grandma and aunt, so we went to visit her. We went to Wal-Mart and saw two Americans which was really strange. We had a snack (they love their snacks), went shopping, ate another snack, shopped some more, and went to Rickey's grandma's house for dinner with her grandma, two aunts, and her mom. Just like Laura in France, the shrimp here is cooked and served with the head, antennae, legs, and tail still on. Some people can peel them with chopsticks, but I'm nowhere near that skilled. Eating shrimp is not my favorite thing--I hate squishing their little brains when I'm pulling off the head. But dinner was good.
Rickey's uncle drove her mom, Rickey, Liz, and me to the bus station. We made the last bus with 15 minutes to spare! Rickey and her mom walked us in and Rickey's mom bought our tickets because in her eyes, we're still children (we kind of are) and we shouldn't be buying our own bus tickets. Then they took us out to the bus and showed us our seats and gave us a list of instructions: Don't nap, watch your bags, take a taxi when you get back to Anshun, don't pay more than 10 yuan. We kept our bags between our feet, napped on and off, and took the bus back to school from Anshun, but Rickey doesn't know that so everything is okay.
During our shopping trip, Liz bought two bracelets made out of etched bone pendants. Since she bought two, Rickey bargained for the four of us (her cousin was with us) to each get a bracelet with a lucky cat charm. Our stupid cats are so not lucky. On our way back to the bus station to go home, we hit traffic and almost didn't make it out of Guiyang that night. When we finally got on the bus at 6:30 (we left at 7:00 that morning, so we were tired), we just wanted to get home. We had the slowest bus driver in the history of China. Then we had to stop on the side of the road to pick up a couple guys. Then we had to stop half an hour later to drop them off on the side of the road. Then we had to stop and get gas. Getting gas for a charter bus takes a looooong time. Then we had to stop and drop some more people off. We finally made it to the bus station at 8:45, half an hour later than usual. Liz and I got on bus 11 which takes us right to the school gate. A couple miles before school, we had to stop to add radiator fluid. Thankfully, we made it back to school just after 9.
The moral of the story is...if you are in China, don't buy lucky cat bracelets. They don't work.
The post below this is the more lighthearted one. This is a little more serious, so if you aren't in the mood for serious...skip it :)
There is a girl in a nearby village. She doesn't have an English name, but we call her Ella. She is 11 years old. Her mother left several years ago, and her father passed away. She lives alone. Joni pays her tuition, and she walks the two miles to school each day. Ella is never late. Be thinking for this girl. It breaks my heart that such a child would have to run an entire household alone. Feed herself, clothe herself, clean up after herself, get to school on time. This is one of the harsh realities of this country. There is no Child Protection Services, no foster care. It's one of the reasons I don't think I'll stay longer than a year here. I can't handle the abortions, the unwanted children, and the child labor.
In other news, Hu Jintao is flexing his political muscle and changing a lot of the ladership. Many of the old leaders are being purged. Not sure yet if this is good or bad, or what will happen. There seems to be some unrest in the police department lately. I also read that Beijing is getting fed up with North Korea's refusal to resume talks about its nuclear missile program. It's a lot scarier being so close.
Finally, I have bouts of homesickness on and off. I think culture shock is settling in. Right now, I have no idea how I am going to make it for nine more months without the ones I love close to me. I think once I get through this semester with all of the holidays, spring will be much easier, but it seems so far away right now. Please be thinking for me. Thanks!
Hello loved ones, I know I've been slacking off with this blogging business. Sorry about that. I recently bought a bag that I paid 30 yuan too much for, but look how pretty it is! This is National Holiday, so the whole country has the week off, which means we get to play around for 7 whole days! It's sooo good to have a break. We've only been teaching for five weeks and we're exhausted...how will we make it straight through until January 12?
Anyway, my day yesterday began when my angel of a neighbor knocked on my door. As you may recall, he speaks hardly any English and I speak hardly any Chinese, so these interactions are always something to write home about. Pun intended. He walked in my house in his matching flannel pajama set. On a side note, it's completely acceptable for people to walk around outside in pajamas (shirts and pants with matching patterns) but my students freak out if I wear flip flops to class. (Sara! Why you wear slipper? April, in America, these are SHOES). Okay back to my neighbor in his pj's, he comes in my house with a bamboo pole that's 7 or so feet long and rams it down my trash chute for me. I have absolutely no idea how he knew that I got a piece of styrofoam stuck in there. It's been blocked for three or four weeks now. But at any rate, I can now use my trash chute again! Woohoo!
Liz and I met Joanie in town for lunch. Joanie's birthday was yesterday, so we spent the day with her. We were going to eat at Dicos (like KFC) but it was crowded like Chuck E Cheese on a Saturday, so we went to the potato lady. She makes fried mashed potato pancake things with vegetables in them, and they're really cheap--1 yuan each. They're sooo good! The three of us ate lunch for a total of 14 yuan (about $2), including drinks that were 3 yuan per bottle. No, it was not liquor, just Pepsi. Sheesh.
We went to get facials. This time, my slimy seaweed mask was not cold, so it was a little less gross. Still squishy, but it's okay. I'm sure it's good for me. Our skin is always really soft when we leave, and if it takes gross squishy things to do that, so be it.
After the facials, we got head massages. We laid on beds with bungee cords across them. Imagine laying on a rubber band bed and you've pretty much got it. They wash your hair and massage your scalp, then rinse, then wash it again. They also wash your face (my face yesterday was squeaky clean). After your hair has been washed about 37 times, they put the shower head right over your face. This caused me to jump and consequently bounce around on my bungee bed because I felt like I was going to drown. That has to be how babies in bathtubs feel. Shortly thereafter, she washed my ears. This was quite the shock. All of a sudden, there was a soapy, petite Chinese finger IN MY EAR. It's like getting a wet willy that you're supposed to enjoy. But it still pretty much just feels like a wet willy. Then she dried out my ears with q-tips. Happily, both of my ear drums are still intact. (Mom, all I could think about the whole time was you telling me not to jam a q-tip too far into my ear when I was little. That was not really that comforting at that moment).
After they deem your hair, face, and ears to be satisfactorily clean, you turn over on your stomach while they massage your back. This was mostly like being tickled to death for me. She touched my neck which is ridiculously sensitive as it is, and then my legs above my knees, and then she grabbed my sides just above my hips. I just about rolled out of the bed. I giggled all the way through. I couldn't help it.
We went downstairs to comb our hair out and put it up. They'll blow dry your hair for you, but first of all, my hair and blow dryers is a terrible combination, and furthermore, sometimes they burn your hair by putting the blow dryer right on it. Anyway, they wanted to comb our hair for us so they could feel it. My guy redid my ponytail about six times. He was very stressed that he could not comb my hair perfectly smooth. Joanie's guy was stressed that she had white hairs. I left with a ponytail tight enough to give me a face lift. I felt like Joan Rivers. All of this for only 15 yuan!
When Liz and I were on the bus on the way home from Joanie's, some middle school girls sat next to us. I don't think they'd ever seen a laili (foreigner) before. They stared at us the entire way home. This must be culture shock setting in, because I was irritated and I wanted really badly to turn around and stare back at her. But I didn't. I mostly forgot about it when Liz and I realized we hadn't been paying attention and weren't sure if we passed our stop or not.
Today, one of our students went to Liz's house to teach her how to cook. I came over for lunch. We had winter melon soup, potatoes, egg and tomato, and thousand year old eggs. I'm not exactly sure if the eggs are really called thousand year old eggs, but they're about the grossest things ever. Basically, they bury eggs in cement for two weeks and take them out and eat them, uncooked. They are clear brown, like really bad Jello. But the rest of lunch was good! Egg and tomato is basically scrambled eggs with tomato and garlic chutes. It's amazingly good. Liz and Danielle made lard from pork fat, which I think is the secret flavor ingredient. Kind of a gross process, but tastes good!
Tomorrow, we might go with Joanie to the cloth market to have clothes made. I'm very excited about this! We are going to be so poor by the end of this month. We are also going Christmas shopping this week to send gifts back to our families. No more spending til Spring Festival. More on the week's activities later!
